Thursday, January 14, 2010

"Fooled" follow-up

Upon one listening to my "vitality" CD yesterday, I DID have greater energy. More lingering tasks were accomplished and others, yet undone, seen in a different light, as though with planning they might be achieved.

One of the good/less-good things about my mind is its ability to throw a great big lasso of wishfulness around everything I want to, or believe I ought to, do and, as you can imagine, the magnitude of the effort is beyond human capacity. Until it can be broken down into workable steps, I sit in an overwhelmed daze and do nothing. While I think I know that I will never completely escape that innundation leaning, I sensed, like a lingering fragrance, the possibility that I might learn to be incremental. One of the biggest surprises of growing older is discovering how much longer it takes to do anything. What used to be a 45 minute job now requires 3 hours and I cannot tell you why. Before Christmas I began a project, so clear in my internal vision, and after 8 hours of focused steps, realized it would require days, the Priority Mail deadline was not going to be met, an envelope of parts set aside for another time.

How well the music can energize me long-term is still unknown. The booklet indicates that the third phase (out of 3) will be like rocket fuel. My guess is that some among us will simply fry our circuts and return to napping, though I don't intend to be one of them. If there is progress, you'll receive periodic updates. As one of the other instructional programs in the catalog urges, "To manifest what you want, you must dwell upon these wishes." I have taken up residence.

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